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Chale News
January 13, 2025

So, what’s in the bag today?

  • National: Mahama’s memo: new year, new administration, and y’all don’t work here anymore.

  • National: Parliament’s giving LinkedIn-meets-reality-show vibes as Mahama’s nominees gear up to defend their portfolios today.

  • Regional: Dear Mahama, it’s time to put your money where your manifesto is— yours faithfully, Gakli.

  • Regional: Techiman’s market fire wasn’t just flames—it was heartbreak served extra crispy.

  • Politics: Sammy Gyamfi claps back: 'Convoy? what convoy?'

  • Fact of the Day: There was a time arsenic tasted like jollof.

  • National: If statues could talk, Akufo-Addo’s would probably ask, “What did I do to deserve this?”

  • National: Operation: Hungry No More. Mahama sends drought relief to SHS.

QUICK BYTE

  • Remember when your ex showed up to your party uninvited, and you had to remind them the RSVP was for last year? That’s basically what the Presidency just did to Akufo-Addo’s appointees. The official “you’re out” memo dropped faster than a TikTok trend, confirming that as of January 7, 2025, all board members appointed by the previous administration have clocked out for good. Now, Mahama says thanks for your service, but please don’t touch anything before you leave. Read more

  • The parliamentary chamber buzzing like Waakye joints on a Monday morning. Why? It’s vetting day, and these ministerial nominees are about to face the biggest oral exam of their lives. First up to bat is Dr. Ato Baah Forson, the Finance Minister-designate. After Ato warms the bench, John Jinapor, the Energy Minister-designate, takes the hot seat. Last on the chopping block is Dr. Dominic Akuritinga Ayine, the Attorney-General and Justice Minister-designate. Read more

  • Last night, the Techiman Central Market pulled a disappearing act—except it wasn’t magic, just a raging fire that swallowed over 100 stalls. Traders watched their life savings go up in smoke, while the only fire tender in town did its best “little engine that could” impression. Want the deets in full? Check out the Deep Dive section.

  • Imagine building a sandcastle only for the tide to ruin it—twice. That’s the vibe with Akufo-Addo’s statue at the Effia Nkwanta roundabout. First, it lost a leg in December 2024, and now, days after he left office, the whole thing’s been yeeted to the ground. Read more

  • The people in Gakli, a Volta Region border town, gave Mahama a solid 97% win at the polls, now they want their promised infrastructure starter pack. Their roads look like a Mario Kart obstacle course, with potholes so deep they probably lead to Wakanda. Pregnant women can barely make it to the hospital, and electricity? Let’s just say acquiring a meter in Gakli feels harder than passing the WAEC math exam. Meanwhile, water remains a myth. Their MP, Dzifa Abla Gomashie, is playing cheerleader, promising Mahama will make it happen. And while the residents are hopeful, they’re also realistic. It’s like when you order delivery and keep refreshing the tracking page—hopeful but not naïve. Read more

FACT OF THE DAY

❝

People once ate arsenic to improve their skin.

  • Sammy Gyamfi, the NDC’s Communication Officer, woke up to claims that he was cruising Accra in a bougie convoy with police escorts. But Sammy’s not having it. In a statement sharper than a tailor’s scissors, he called the accusations a "fabricated, malicious vibe." According to Sammy, he’s just an ordinary guy living his ordinary life—no sirens, no entourage, nada. Read more

  • Senior high schools are out here struggling with food shortages—students probably contemplating how many rice grains make a full meal. So President Mahama pulled a reverse uno card and said, “Let’s feed these kids now!” The game plan? Reassigning drought relief food from Tema warehouses to the schools ASAP. It’s like when your mom says the stew in the freezer is for Christmas, but then you’re starving on Tuesday, so she heats it up. Read more

DEEP DIVE

Techiman market goes grey

Imagine prepping for market day, only to wake up to your shop turned into a scene from Game of Thrones. That’s exactly what went down in Techiman Central Market when a fire decided to give the night sky some extra drama. Over 100 stalls, packed with goods worth millions, were reduced to charcoal, leaving traders clutching their heads.

The blaze started around 9:15 PM, and if you thought the fire service had it covered, hmmm. Techiman has just one fire tender. Yes, one. And while it bravely showed up to the chaos, it felt like bringing a straw to an ocean fight. Six more tenders had to be called from neighboring towns, but by the time they arrived, the fire had already won the “market barbecue” championship.

Traders aren’t just mourning their goods—they’re grappling with existential dread. One woman tearfully asked how she’d repay her loans after her shop turned into a ghost of Christmas past. Another lamented, “Why does a whole metropolis have firefighting resources that feel more like a bucket brigade?” Valid questions, fam.

Meanwhile, the Bono East Regional Fire Commander, Naomi Ofori Adubea Sarpong, says the market’s congested layout made the fire harder to contain. Like, why does every market in Ghana look like it was designed by someone playing Tetris on hard mode? Now she’s urging residents to stay vigilant during the dry season, but you can’t exactly side-eye a fire out of existence, can you? Read more

NEWS SOURCES

Today’s stories are curated from: