I took the L

and the hampers disappeared!

Author

Chale News
December 16, 2024

So, what’s in the bag today?

  • National: Mahama’s Christmas hamper diaries: When the gifts ghosted him.

  • Politics: He brought the vibes, they brought the chaos—Bawumia’s campaign story in true NPP fashion.

  • National: Parliament’s like jollof—add young spice, but don’t forget the seasoned ingredients.

  • National: Parliament’s reopening today, and let’s just say the tea is hotter than the shitor at your favourite waakye.

  • Politics: Free SHS is not going anywhere.

  • Fact of the Day: What do Michelin tires and Michelin stars have in common?

  • Health: Cholera’s out? Vaccines are in—GHS hits the Western Region with jabs!

  • National: NDC is gonna give the constitution a makeover.

QUICK BYTE

  • Back in 2016, when John Mahama took an L in the elections, it wasn’t just the presidency he lost—it was the hampers too. Yes, those beautifully wrapped boxes of wine, biscuits, and who-knows-what-else stopped coming. And the queue of people vying for a few minutes of his time? Gone. Poof. Like a WhatsApp status after 24 hours. During a thanksgiving service, Mahama spilled on how defeat humbled him and taught him that power is as fleeting as New Year’s resolutions. The hampers might’ve stopped, but his gratitude for family and true friends never did. Read more

  • Parliament is like that group chat that’s been on mute for weeks, but now everyone’s back online, and the drama is about to unfold. The NDC just pulled a glow-up, snatching the majority, while some big names in the NPP got ghosted by voters. The first sitting since the 2024 elections kicks off today at the Grand Arena. It’s not just a meeting oo—it’s the aftermath of a political FIFA match, and Speaker Bagbin is referee. Let’s see who’s bringing vibes, and who’s catching Ls in this new setup. Read more

  • Imagine pulling off a cross-country tour so lit that you leave Beyoncé-level crowds in your wake, only for your squad to snooze on the follow-up. That’s basically what Dr. Bawumia went through. According to outgoing MP Andy Kwame Appiah-Kubi, Bawumia’s campaign energy was unmatched—like a marathon runner at a 100m sprint. But after he left, the “ground game” was, let’s just say, in airplane mode. Get the 411 in the Deep Dive section below

  • Ghana’s President-elect, John Dramani Mahama, just pulled up with some solid assurances about the Free SHS policy. He’s saying, “Nobody’s scrapping it. Chill with the rumors, fam!” Despite what the NPP said during campaign szn, Mahama’s ready to secure the bag for Free SHS—literally, with dedicated funding. Mahama’s already planning to bench the struggles that have plagued the policy. Overcrowded classrooms? On the list. Delayed funds? He’s promising to fix that. It’s giving “new coach, same game plan but better execution. Read more

FACT OF THE DAY

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Michelin tires created Michelin Stars to award high-end restaurants.

  • Cholera’s been doing the most in Ghana lately, particularly in the Western and Central Regions with over 900 cases and 10 deaths reported. So the Ghana Health Service is pulling up in the Western Region today with a cholera vaccination drive that’ll run till December 19. The goal? Jab up more than 600,000 folks aged two and above across four MMDAs. They’ve got teams stationed at all the key spots—churches, mosques, markets, and schools—because nothing says “we got this” like meeting people where they are. Pregnant and breastfeeding women, though, will have to sit this one out. Read more

  • Andy Appiah-Kubi is bowing out and has a little advice for the squad taking over. According to him, Ghana’s Parliament is starting to look like a Gen Z TikTok challenge. He’s all for the young MPs bringing fresh energy, but…The man didn’t hold back: “Parliament is about debate. The confidence to stand, the finesse to speak, and the courage to challenge—it’s not casual Friday at the office.” You need to know your stuff, understand parliamentary procedures, and serve it up with confidence. For him, the perfect Parliament is like your favourite soup—young, vibrant ingredients balanced with a good dose of seasoned ones. Read more

  • The NDC’s got big plans — and the 1992 Constitution is getting a makeover. With a solid parliamentary win, the party says it's time to bring the document into the modern age. Vice Chairman Mawunyo Agbe assures Ghanaians that this won’t be just another talk shop; they’re bringing real change with fresh ideas. No more dusty laws. The people’s voices? Front and center. Read more

DEEP DIVE

The vibes were immaculate, but the execution? Tragic.

You throw the party of the century, everyone’s vibing, and you’re the star attraction. Then, your hype crew—the ones meant to keep the after-party alive—decides to nap instead. That’s basically what went down with Dr. Bawumia’s campaign, and Andy Appiah-Kubi is out here spilling all the tea.

This man Bawumia toured everywhere. From villages so remote they probably don’t have Wi-Fi, to Appiah-Kubi’s constituency, the Veep was on a mission. And guess what? The people showed up. Crowds so thick! But the minute Bawumia left, it was like someone turned off the party lights. The “ground soldiers” who were supposed to carry the momentum? Nah, they clocked out early.

And oh, the drama! Appiah-Kubi didn’t hold back, calling out his constituency execs for literally campaigning against him. Can you imagine? That’s like your squad hyping up the rival team at your own game. And the sabotage wasn’t even subtle—chairman, vice-chairman, everyone was in on it.

Appiah-Kubi says the “big boss” himself, Nana Addo, wasn’t exactly helping the vibes. MPs begged, pleaded, and even pulled a “96-signature petition,” but the man allegedly hit them with the la la la, I can’t hear you routine.

Anyway, the moral of the story is, you can’t vibe your way out of bad teamwork. Even the best hype man needs a crew that actually shows up—and it looks like Bawumia didn’t have one. Read more

NEWS SOURCES

Today’s stories are curated from: