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Justice is slow but blows are faster

Counsel nearly went home to rub Aboniki.

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Chale News
August 23, 2025

So, what’s in the bag today?

  • Crime: Adabraka Court: Where lawyers leave with arguments… and almost black eyes.

  • Education: GES payroll looking like a horror movie: ghosts everywhere, and they’re the ones getting paid.

  • Agriculture: Ghana cocoa farmers aren’t just farming beans, they’re farming bags, literal cash bags.

  • Crime: Ridge Hospital turned chaotic after patient allegedly attacked nurses. The drama isn’t just medical, it’s physical.

  • Crime: A Ridge Hospital nurse is suing activist Ralph Saint Williams for ₵7 million, accusing him of assault and defamation after he allegedly attacked her and later discredited her on social media.

  • Fact of the Day: Handshakes were originally a safety measure. Can you believe that?

  • Crime: GHS 13 million up in smoke!

QUICK BYTE

  • You know how every Ghanaian family meeting somehow ends in shouting, prayer, and one uncle storming off? Yeah, now imagine that energy but outside a courtroom. Two suspects are standing trial for allegedly murdering Immigration Officer Stephen King Amoah. Emotions are high, obviously. The defense lawyer was just doing his job, asking the court to let his client go to Korle Bu instead of the Police Hospital because, according to him, the man’s eyes were looking like he just came out of an all-night rehearsal. Court said, “Nice try, bossman, but nah, write a formal application.” Boom. Case adjourned till September 4. Read more

The family of the late officer, already grieving and frustrated, saw the lawyer stepping out and basically said, “C’mon, let’s settle this here and now.” The lawyer had to be rescued by police and literally re-escorted back into the courtroom for safety.

  • PAC has caught some headteachers validating salaries of dead staff (yes, really). They’ve been ordered to refund the cash in 30 days. Ministry says they’ll finally clamp down on the ghost-worker party. Let’s see if this time the ghosts actually get exorcised. Get the full deets in the Deep Dive section.

  • So apparently there’s been some street talk that cocoa farmers in Côte d’Ivoire are eating better than our own farmers here. You know how rumours spread — one uncle in a trotro says “Ivorians dey chop big,” and before you know it, it’s gospel truth. But COCOBOD just came out like, “Eiii, abeg, stop the cap!” Turns out Ghanaian cocoa farmers are actually bagging more per sack than their neighbours. Get the 411 in the Deep Dive section below

  • Ridge Hospital turned into a scene straight out of a telenovela this week. It was an angry patient aka Ralph allegedly throwing punches at nurses. Yes, the people meant to save lives ended up dodging blows like they were in a Mayweather fight. And of course, the video went viral. Ghanaian drama never misses camera time. Health Minister Akandoh has stepped in with the big-boy voice, saying “some arrests have been made.” Read more

Here’s how it went down: Ralph allegedly stormed the emergency ward like he was auditioning for “Fast & Furious: Ridge Drift,” demanding instant treatment for a finger injury. Nurses told him, “bossu, procedures dey.” Instead of chilling, he allegedly flipped, threw hands, filmed staff without consent, and turned the ward into a mashup of TikTok Live and WWE. One of the nurses, Rejoice Tsotsoo Bortei, says she caught punches and a phone-to-the-body combo

And as if that wasn’t enough, Ralph later hopped online and told the streets she was lying,

  • You know how your mum says, “keep your hands to yourself”? Clearly Ralph Saint Williams, a.k.a. “Ralph De Fellow Ghanaian,” missed that lesson. Because now, the Ridge Hospital nurse has him in court with a fat ₵7 million lawsuit. ₵5 million for allegedly punching her, and another ₵2 million for running his mouth on social media. Man’s wallet might need oxygen before this case is over. Read more

FACT OF THE DAY

❝

Handshakes were originally a safety measure.

In 5th century Greece, handshakes were done to make sure that the other person wasn’t carrying a hidden weapon. The hand clasp proved that your hand was empty and shaking it was meant to “shake out” weapons hiding in the sleeve.

  • A mystery “No Fees Stress” billboard popped up at Flowerpot Roundabout and was quickly disowned by every government agency it carried logos for. Roads Ministry called it illegal, LeKMA said they’d already removed it a day before the Ministry’s directive. But the billboard looked so government-approved, you’d think the president himself climbed up to paste it. Anyway, it’s gone now; LeKMA got rid of it. Read more

  • NACOC torched GH¢12.6 million worth of seized drugs at Bundase. We’re talking cannabis, cocaine, and nearly six million tramadol and ecstasy capsules all gone in one giant bonfire. The haul, unusually massive for just two months, was highlighted by a 40-footer container of tramadol intercepted at Tema Port (worth GH¢11.8 million alone). Read more

DEEP DIVE

When Ghosts Get Paid More Than You

Fam, Ghana’s education system is wild o. Like, you’re here hustling for “small boy danger” salary, and meanwhile… somebody’s late uncle who’s been chilling six feet under since 2022 is still cashing payslip alerts. If heaven had MoMo, trust me, some of these headteachers would’ve found a way to send it there too.

So here’s the tea: the 2024 Auditor-General’s report just exposed that some headteachers have been validating “ghost staff”, we’re talking dead people, ex-staff, and maybe even Wakanda recruits. And the craziest part? They weren’t doing it by mistake. Nope. Some were pocketing the cash like it was Black Friday sale at Game. The Public Accounts Committee (PAC) looked at them and said, “You’ve got 30 days to pay back, chop bar-style, no credit today.”

Even MPs couldn’t believe it. Samuel Atta Mills literally burst out in Parliament with, “Awurade Nyankopon, GES this is a problem oo.” That was not parliamentary language, that was uncle language when ECG takes light in the middle of Black Stars penalties. Pure shock. And honestly? Same. Every year PAC drags GES for the same wahala, and still, it’s like deja vu with more zeros.

Now the Ministry of Education is promising to fix it. Deputy Minister Apaak swore up and down that they’ll hunt down the dishonest ones inside GES. Read more

Ghanaian cocoa farmers earn more than Ivorians?

Let’s break it down: right now, if you’re a Ghanaian farmer, one 64kg bag of cocoa is bringing you about ₵3,228.75. Slide across to Côte d’Ivoire and they’re getting around ₵2,553. Small maths: that’s like an extra ₵675 per bag just for being Ghanaian. If it was SHS days, that’s the difference home chow and dining hall food.

COCOBOD even flexed with the big numbers: on a tonne, Ghanaian farmers are pocketing over ₵10,000 more than Ivorians. Bruh!

But COCOBOD says they’re keeping prices this high not just to make farmers smile but to stop the smuggling wahala. You know how some people are always tempted to sneak cocoa across borders for a “better deal”? Well, Ghana is basically saying, “Sit tight, chop here, we got you.” And with our cocoa already carrying global bragging rights for quality, now we’ve got the numbers to match. Ghana cocoa isn’t just the best, it’s the bougiest in the sub-region. Read more

NEWS SOURCES

Today’s stories are curated from: